What is your anxiety telling you?
I know anxiety well. It's been long-time 'friend'.
For years, I hated it.
I felt it as an anathema for my life. The panic in my chest, cramping hands, the overthinking, doing everything to stay small and undetectable, while actually just wanting to finally LIVE and fulfil my potential...
I had to solve it so I could get on with my life.
I went to many therapists, did many retreats. For years.
That was until I realised my anxiety was simply trying to tell me something.
Like a flashing light on the dashboard of my car...
Though anxiety (or any uncomfortable feeling) can feel painful and relentless, it's not there to torment you.
Nature is clever. It wouldn't design something like anxiety just to mess with you.
When you let yourself actually experience the feeling, things like memories, thoughts, images and other sensations can rise up to your conscious mind while your attention is available.
In my case, when I actually let myself be with it, my anxiety showed me sadness and anger from my childhood. Events from my early years that scared me into a hole. Beliefs little-me had taken on that made me crumble from the inside. My realness — and power. How my voice, anger, needs and desires are valuable and welcome.
And now, as an adult, I can be the mature one to stand up and stand in for these parts of me. I can integrate it all.
Each time, I feel bigger, lighter, more myself.
Your feelings contain things your subconscious wants to give back to you. Things like your power. Truth. Tenderness. Wholeness.
What is your anxiety trying to show you?
To solve something, go into it. Deeply. Fully. All the way to the root.
There are specific tools and practices in mindful-somatics and Internal Family Systems that can help you to feel — safely — and get down to the root too.
So that it's not just s o m e t h i n g you know is there. You can get to the bottom of it.
How to know what your anxiety is telling you: a somatic practice
This is not about trying to change or fix the feeling, which is often what we try to do when we feel bad. (This is where positive thinking and practices to 'improve' your mood aren't helpful — they come in later, not now).
The key is to bring all your attention to the feeling as it's occurring in your body, without trying to change them or fix it — just be there and be curious.
All emotions occur in the body as a certain sensation. Your given feeling might show up as a buzzing, heat/cold, numbness, openness/tightness, light/heavy, etc.
Bring your attention to the sensation in the body and be totally present with it. Not to change it or fix it, but to notice what other information might pop up while you're present with the feeling.
As you give your time and attention to the feeling (without trying to bat it away or resist it), notice...
What's there? What does it make you think about? What does it remind you of? What images or memories show up?
Follow each clue, like a breadcrumb trail.
And let yourself feel it all.
If it's feeling like a lot, you can ask the feeling not to overwhelm you. This works.
You also might want support in this process, especially when the emotions are big or evasive.
If you want support, the work I do in mindful-somatics and Internal Family Systems is amazing to get to the bottom of anxiety (or other difficult feelings) — have a zero-obligation complimentary 30-minute chat with me to share what’s going on and find out more about 1:1 work.
I know this can help you befriend all parts of yourself and come home to your wholeness.
With you,
Caitlyn
P.S. Got a friend who is dealing with anxiety? Share this with them.
“The session with Caitlyn helped me understand why I was feeling ‘off’ with someone I really like. We uncovered a memory I had forgotten… It was a key that unlocked many answers. A lot of it came back to my dad. I processed that memory and felt the emotions that I didn’t have a chance to feel at that time. It brought me closer to my dad and this person I like”
